Happy Sunday. I must warn you up front, I just completed my 4th Annual NY City Half Marathon, so I’m a bit tired and “edgy” which is why I feel ready to “tackle” this very important topic if you are dating. I understand it is a bit controversial among both the boy/men and the women I discuss this with, but I feel VERY strongly about the fact that when you are meeting a boy/man for the first time, you must let him pay. Here is why:
1. IT IS SPIRITUAL! You may think I’m “crazy” in saying this, but on a spiritual level where gender roles are critical, it is so important that the boy/man “feel” like a boy/man. How do they feel their masculinity? By being the caretaker and the provider to the female. Women, if you take your money out of your pocket, you are taking away his so very important gender role. Don’t leave him feeling less of a man. Very bad for the spiritual connection between you two that you are trying to develop.
2. Letting him pay AFFIRMS YOUR ROLE AS THE MOST VALUABLE WOMAN YOU ARE! You are gorgeous, smart, worthy of being treated like the Queen that you are. Let him know this by allowing him to treat you. He must sense that he is out with a person of value, worthy of being treated. Please make sure he thinks this NO MATTER WHAT. Keep your money in your pocket or your value as a woman runs the risk of diminishing in his boy/man mind.
Then, make sure after your first date of coffee, he asks you out for dinner or dinner and a movie, or theater, or something more substantial for the next date AND YET AGAIN, HE PAYS. No money offered gals, PLEASE, not even the tip.
If things are going well, of course you can treat on the 4th or 5th date. Always nice to make him a home cooked meal. More important is to give time, time. Nuff said.
Happy Dating. Happy Sunday. Thanks for reading.