Boy Addiction: “People, Places, Things”


Happy Sunday. Today I’m tackling a popular “12 step program” concept called “people, places, things” as it relates to my addiction to boys. The idea behind “people, places, things”, as I understand it, is that you can easily perpetuate your addictive patterns by putting yourself around people, places, and things which enable you to actively participate in your addictive patterns. Ok, that sounds very “psycho-babble”. Putting it more simply, I am reminded during my dating boys that I get easily attracted to those who are bad for me. And I want to be around them constantly. The good news is, using my recovery tools (and friends who know me well), I can much more easily STOP IT!

So now I suppose it’s time for a story? I must be honest. For this blog I really feel compelled to generalize. Mostly to protect those who may have fallen victim to my “slips”. You see, I have been around the block way too much with boys to know that if they are super fun and super attractive to me, it will lead to disaster. Usually these are the party boys. You know, the fun ones who do not have a care in the world? They are really no different than a bottle of vodka for an alcoholic or a smoke of something for a drug addict. Boy, do I love to spend time with “Mr. Carefree Boy”.

But as I have learned all too often, settle in with “Mr. Carefree boy” and he quickly becomes “Mr. Take Care of Me Boy”. And this is where my self destructive, boy addictive behaviors get ugly. Some of the side effects of my addiction include a total loss of self care: Weight gain, sleep disturbances, lack of a savings account to name a few. I’m sure my close friends could tell you about the bad things that happen to me when I’m deep into my boy addiction.

So here I am today trying to live a good, clean, “boy sober” life. My father said to me (about a year ago) “Leslie, when you meet someone, you are going to stop running”. For the first time in my adult years, I’m determined to prove him wrong! And when I meet my man, I know he will encourage and support me to keep on running…

Thank you for sharing my journey…


4 thoughts on “Boy Addiction: “People, Places, Things”

  1. lynn

    Thanks for sharing!! I disagree with your Dad..don’t think you will stop running when you meet Mr. Right…it is for you what hockey is for is good, mood stabilizer! Your partner will learn and appreciate that about you..may not run 4 marathons in Fall but you will always run!

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