You have to like me to date me…


hearts man woman

Good morning readers and Happy Sunday yet again.  The weeks fly by, but I seem to never run out of topics.  Today I wanted to write about something my ex-husband used to say, “To be with me you have to like me”.  Needless to say it turned out he and I didn’t like each other and that is why we are no longer together.  Sounds silly, but in thinking about this it truly is a much deeper lesson for us all.

Of course when boy and girl first meet there is typically a strong attraction.  As the picture details, usually girl gets attracted emotionally through her heart and boy gets attracted through his (well – take a look at the picture).  This is the initial attraction process.  However, couples grow into a much deeper level of attraction if they truly grow to like each other as people.  This takes time.

I am currently in a relationship with a boy who truly likes me.  And I am growing more and more every day to truly like him.  What makes us like each other?  Well, there are some very basic truths that I would be happy to share.

1.  We both have loving families who support us.  Having this in common really makes us appreciate this in each other.

2.  We have the same values.  I am VERY politically liberally and into social justice and it turns out not only is he, but his children are too.  It is SO NICE.

3.  We have the same sarcastic sense of humor.  It is so nice to have someone I can laugh with all the time who completely “gets me”.

4.  He always appreciates the little things I do.  He is always thanking me for the small stuff.  Something I do with him too, so it is REALLY nice and refreshing to get this in return.

5.  He is an amazing listener.  Sadly, I cannot say this about myself, but I’m trying to get better at this.  I am learning from him.  He never complains when I go on and on about my running.  And for those of you who really know me, you know I can talk!

6.  He is a GREAT father.  Having a great father myself, I truly respect the value in this.  His children adore him and this means a lot to me.

7.  We are always happy when we are together.  I cannot remember a moment when we were together that we’d rather not have been.  We truly enjoy each other’s company.  He always tells me how he feels he can be himself with me, and I feel the same way about him.

I could continue, but I’m trying to drive home the point that I’ve spent a lot of years with boys who didn’t like me or I didn’t like them.  There was arguing and strife.  I’m learning through my current relationship that it doesn’t have to be this way.  Nothing is perfect.  There are and always will be issues to try to work through as a couple.  Perhaps we will stand the test of time and perhaps we won’t.  Relationships are fluid and one day at a time.  But it is so nice to have the “right stuff” as a base to work from.

I pray for this for you in all of your relationships.  One day at a time…

Thanks for reading.


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